Bitter or better

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Bitter or better

This title alone holds so much weight, when I hear this it really makes me think. So many things can happen in this world in our lives that can leave a chip on our shoulders. Wether it’s childhood  hurt, family hurt Church hurt or relationship hurt. Usually with any of these things happen it’s by someone we trust or in a situation where we feel safe enough to let our guard down.

So what do we do how do we move on, how do we not make others pay for the hurt that we have experienced? Do we stay mad?  Honestly, that’s easy to do when we are hurt. In some cases, our heart is broken in multiple pieces and we can’t begin to know how to patch it up, so why forgive, why trust. I guess the saying everyone likes to use is “burn me once shame on me burn me twice shame on you”.

But is that really how it works is that how God wants us to approach situations? Not at all! At the end of the day we have to put it in God’s hand.  Forgiveness is not for that other person, it is for us. If we hold on to the hurt the memories it will set in to our hearts and turn into bitterness. Trust me, I know if somebody turned their back on you and you have been giving them your all, you probably wouldn’t want anything to do with them. But what if God did the same thing to us? How many times have we turned our backs on him, knowing he wanted us to do something but we did our own thing? If God said he was tired he wasn’t forgiving us anymore, we all would be lost.
Ephesians 4:31 says “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.”

So let’s keep it real in infidelity, to find out your spouse has stepped out  it is easy to find yourself in a state of bitterness, rage and anger and everything else mentioned in Ephesians 4:31 but God wants you to get rid of it. How? As a person you can not do this? Or can you?
You can! It is possible but you can’t do it by yourselve. We need God, prayer and a support system. You can do it, it will be a process and it will work if you work it.

Colossians 3:13“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

As I stated before forgiveness is for you because once you can actually forgive it’s freeing. Sometimes as you go through the process and past the test, things become so much better but you have to go through it the right way, you have to give it to God and it takes 2 to work at it.  We are human and we hurt, we have moments highs and lows, sometimes along the way their might be triggers that cause memories to resurface. As you go through, those moments become few and far between. Just allow yourself to work through it, talk about it and seek counsel if needed. None of us are perfect but we strive for perfection. 
And when you’re struggling a quick little prayer is Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

Psalms 51:10